Identity, Personality, Roles, Sexuality and our Sense of Self.

Our sense of our own identity is shaped by our background, our personal history, culture and heritage, our race, sexuality, our family and our life experiences, roles and relationships. Counselling and psychotherapy may help you discover more of your own personal identity by supporting you in exploring and developing a more acurate perception of who you are at your core being, rather than what others expect you to be.

You may be living in a country which is not your own and somehow missing your home although you left for good reasons. People sometimes have a sense of rootlessness; preserving your identity and where you are from may be important.

Some people may suffer from an identity crisis, feeling uneasy and awkward about who they are; we may have an outdated sense of how we are to be in the world; there may be a mismatch between what we present to the world and what is going on inside of us. Counselling and psychotherapy can help us explore the image or mask we present to the world as well as what is going on inside, how we feel and think deep inside ourselves.

We may struggle to be connected to our intrinsic worth, perhaps having forgotten who we are, that we matter and have a place in the world. For various reasons some of us may be confused about our own true identity, perhaps due to the roles we have taken on. We may believe we actually are this role. Life can be a bit like a drama or a play being acted out. Old roles may have become redundant. Yet living how we want to be, rather than how we should be may be challenging. The image we present to the world may be different from what is going on inside. Inside we may be feeling one thing, yet constantly show something else.

Psychotherapy and counselling may explore with you who you are at your core to gain a stronger sense of who you are, to start living more truthfully and being more real. Psychotherapy and counselling can help us explore questions we hold, facets of our personality which may need to be integrated and look at what makes up our personality, like our body, mind, feelings, sexuality, spirituality, creative or artistic imagination and curiosity as well as our unconscious motivations.

Some people may be tired of certain outdated roles in life, which may be draining their physical, emotional or psychological energies. They may long to be more real, genuine and comfortable in their own skin and authentic. This longing can be powerful, yet bring about fears of being too exposed. This may be linked to feelings of guilt or shame. People may feel that if they are just being themselves, people may not like them anymore, disapprove of us or get upset. They are then caught in a double bind of not wanting to upset people, yet longing to be themselves. Some of us have simply learnt to please others and continually seek approval. Psychotherapy and counselling can support you, at a deep level, at your own pace in being more real, if that is your desire.

Our personal identity can sometimes be constricted or restricted – be too small – and the bigger picture, all of who we are can be overlooked. We may have lost sight of or got disconnected with parts of ourselves, our inentity may be evolving, or needs to be explored further. We may be uncomfortable with our way of being in the world and long for a more authentic self to emerge, which might be more at ease with ourselves and others. Counselling and psychotherapy can help you struggle and find answers to these and other questions and help you develop a much stronger sense of yourself. It can help you with all the integration of all aspects of yourself and support you in exploring your own identity, your intrinstc worth and self-esteem, your own essence and presence. Deep change and transformation may occurr.